Shocking, I know.
Let me preface this by saying I fully believe in college. I fully intend on my daughter going to college, or at least completing some sort of technical or traditional college. And I will help her every way I possibly can.
But I’m not going to pay for her college.
Why?
That’s a great question. My (and my husband’s) reasons are threefold:
Work Ethic:
The most important quality that we want to instill in our daughter – over and above even how to manage our finances, and to respect us, her parents – is a good work ethic. What is a work ethic? According to Wikipedia, work ethic is:
- Work ethic is a value based on hard work and diligence. It is also a belief in the moral benefit of work and its ability to enhance character. Workers exhibiting a good work ethic in theory would be selected for better positions, more responsibility and ultimately promotion.
I believe that by just handing my daughter her college education, without her having to work for it, it will undo everything we will have done her entire life to install a good work ethic in her. Make sense?
So, we’ll encourage our daughter to do well in high school, in order to obtain scholarships for college, live at home for her first 2 years of community college (so save money) and work her way through college in order to graduate debt-free!
Value:
I worked hard before and during college. How? During high school I studied ridiculously hard, got a stellar ACT score and GPA, and was given a $40,000 scholarship to college! Then, during college I got a job as a server at a local restaurant. Really, when you’re in college, there isn’t much better pay per hour than being a server or bartender, so that’s what I did.
I believe that allowing our daughter to work her way through college will make her realize just how valuable her college education is. The fact that she is paying for herself will motivate her to work harder. And knowing just how expensive college is, that will motivate her to learn more.
At least that’s what it did for me.
A Bright Future:
If we can instill a good work ethic in our daughter, and make her realize that value of her education, I believe we will be setting her up for a responsible and happy adulthood.
She will know the value of hard work.
She appreciate every dollar.
She will know what it is like to be without debt – and never want it any other way.
We will have given her the best start we can.
And that’s all any parent can do, right?
What we will do instead –
Don’t think we’ll leave her without any sort of assistance. I’m sure some of you are thinking we’re terrible parents, but don’t worry, we fully intend to help her out:
- By letting her live at home during some or all of college, if she chooses a school close
- By helping her choose an affordable school
- By giving her all the help we can while she’s in high school, in hopes that she’ll obtain several scholarships
- We’ll help her with travel costs, if necessary
- And we’ll do everything we can to help her get a job while in college
We’ve also started saving some money to give her after college. We may use it to fund her wedding, or maybe as a graduation present so she can put a down payment on a house – or maybe we’ll give it to her just because we feel she’s responsible enough to handle a large sum of money.
Whatever we decide to do, we won’t be paying for her college.
Are you paying for your children’s college? Tell me in the comments below!
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FAQs
If your parents can't or won't help you pay for college, you might still be able to take out federal or private student loans as well as apply for scholarships. Emily Guy Birken is a Credible authority on student loans and personal finance.
Is it possible to get through college and graduate debt free? ›
What does it mean to graduate debt-free? Graduating debt-free means completing a college education without the burden of student loans. This can be achieved through a combination of scholarships, grants, personal or family savings, work-study programs or income from part-time work.
Is graduating debt free worth it? ›
The Benefits of Graduating Debt-Free
Graduating without student loan debt can bring numerous advantages for your future financial life. It can provide more financial freedom and flexibility, allowing you to prioritize other financial goals like saving for retirement, buying a home, or starting a business.
How much debt does the average college student graduate with? ›
Average student loan debt in America
51% of 2021-22 bachelor's degree recipients graduated with an average of $29,400 in student loan debt. Among all borrowers, the average student loan debt in 2023 was $38,787. 53% of federal student loan borrowers owe $20,000 or less.
What happens if you never pay a college back? ›
Eventually, your student loans will be put into default and you may lose federal loan benefits, have your wages garnished, get barred from federal student aid among other consequences. Your loan holder may sue you, as well. If you ignore the court date or the court's orders — that could land you in jail.
Why are parents obligated to pay for college? ›
Are parents legally obligated to pay for college? State law rules that the obligation to financially support your kids ends when the child turns 18. That means parents have no legal obligation to pay for their child's college education — with one exception.
How to pay for college when you're broke? ›
Some options to help with paying for college include applying for scholarships and grants, looking into work-study options, cutting costs and applying for loans. You can still look into saving for future education with 529 plans, which allow contributions through investments.
What percentage of people graduate college debt free? ›
Key Takeaways. More than four in ten students at public four-year universities complete their bachelor's degree with zero debt. Nearly eight in ten students graduate with less than $30,000 in debt.
What is the number one reason students drop out of college? ›
The No. 1 reason students have thought about leaving school is due to financial challenges (30 percent), followed by motivation or life changes (24 percent) and mental health challenges (18 percent).
How to pay for college without debt? ›
17 Ways to Go to College Debt-Free
- Attend a Public School as an In-State Student. ...
- Attend Community College. ...
- Attend Online College. ...
- Attend a No-Loan College. ...
- Save With a 529 Plan. ...
- Earn Scholarships. ...
- Earn Grants. ...
- Participate in a Work-Study Program.
To complete graduate school without accruing debt, consider programs that offer research or teaching assistantships, or scholarships. Another way to save cash is to pick a shorter-term program, such as one year versus two, or a program at a public school versus a private school.
Does tuition debt go away? ›
All borrowers on the SAVE Plan receive forgiveness after 20 or 25 years, depending on whether they have loans for graduate school. The benefit is based upon the original principal balance of all Federal loans borrowed to attend school, not what a borrower currently owes or the amount of an individual loan.
Is it a parent's responsibility to pay back their children's student loans? ›
When the time comes to start making payments, only the student is obligated to repay these loans — not the parents. In fact, there's no co-signer. If the student defaults on a federal student loan, it will affect the student's credit and won't be reported on the parent's credit history.
What is the average parent PLUS debt? ›
The average Parent PLUS loan amount exceeds $30,000.
According to the most recently available data from the National Center for Education Statistics (NCES), the average loan amount for Parent PLUS loans in 2019-2020 was $34,630. When adjusting for inflation, that's $37,970 in 2021-2022 constant dollars.
What are three ways to lower the cost of college? ›
1. Improve Your Chances of an Affordable College Cost
- Apply to generous schools. ...
- Don't commit early to a college. ...
- Look for scholarships before and during college. ...
- Improve your financial aid eligibility. ...
- Learn how to evaluate aid packages. ...
- Get college credit on the cheap. ...
- Get a student job during college.
Your dependency status has nothing to do with whether your parent claims you on their tax return. In addition, if the FAFSA determines that you are a dependent undergraduate student, it does not matter which parent claims you on their taxes.
Should parents pay for college if they can afford it? ›
Yes, parents should pay for college
Here are a handful of reasons why parents might want to help out: Degree completion: For many students, the ability to focus on schoolwork and not worry about maintaining a part-time job can allow them to maintain full-time status and complete their degree faster.
Are parents responsible for student loan debt? ›
Parents are not liable for repaying federal student loans taken out by their child, even though families are required to list both the student's and parent's information when filling out the Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA).
Can you get kicked out of college if you don't pay? ›
Yes. Unless a student has paid tuition or made satisfactory arrangements to pay tuition, the college is under no obligation to allow the student to continue to enroll.
