The Psychology Of Stuff: Why We Want More (2024)

The Psychology Of Stuff: Why We Want More (1)

Note: This article about the psychology of stuff is by contributing writer, Tammy Strobel.

When I started to simplify my life, I began researching the psychology of stuff. I wanted to understand my desire to buy more things; especially when I had enough. Plus, chasing after more had become a defining feature of my life, and I didn’t like it. My behaviors only led to debt, unhappiness, and a house full of stuff I didn’t need. Recent data suggests I’m not alone.

“Today the International Shipping and Packing Association, the trade group for moving companies, says the average American home contains about ten thousand pounds of stuff. That’s spread across anywhere from ten thousand to fifty thousand items light and heavy – from pens to TVs. The Wall Street Journal found that Americans now spend $1.2 trillion annually on stuff we don’t need,” writes Michael Easter in Scarcity Brain.

7 Insights On The Psychology of Stuff

Understanding why I craved more – and learning how to curb my impulses – helped me become a mindful consumer, evaluate my finances, and appreciate the stuff that surrounded me.In this article, I will provide a summary of what I’ve learned about the psychology of stuff. I’ve broken this down into 7 insights based on my readings. Also, you’ll find practical tips to help you curb the desire for more.

1. The Scarcity Loop offers a good explanation of the psychology of stuff.

Michael Easter argues in his book, Scarcity Brain, that behaviors like gambling, overeating, binge drinking, overbuying, and more are reactions to perceived scarcity. This leads people into what he calls a “scarcity loop.” The loop has three parts: “opportunity → unpredictable rewards → quick repeatability.” Ultimately, this loop triggers a “scarcity mindset.”

Easter explained how the scarcity mindset appeared in his life. He said, “I’d think of or see a product that I thought might improve my life. Then I’d search the internet for the right version of it and eventually stumble upon a winner. Then I’d repeat the cycle. The UPS lady and I were on a first-name basis.”As a result, Easter began to examine how he could curb his shopping habit and came up with a rule to guide his purchase – “gear not stuff.” I’ll share more about his rule below.

2. Social comparison makes us want to buy more.

When I worked in the investment management industry, I compared myself to my coworkers constantly. They had big homes, nice cars, and clothes that were purchased at fancy stores. I wanted those things too. My desire to “keep up with the Joneses” led to excessive shopping and dissatisfaction. I discovered that the saying, “comparison is the thief of joy” is very true.

3. We can be influenced by advertising and marketing.

Advertising has a profound effect on the amount of stuff that I’ve purchased. Marketers have also shaped my desires, created perceived needs, and according to author Jean Kilbourne, advertising has changed the way I think and feel. Understanding how advertising works, and its persuasive nature, helps me resist the tendency to buy more stuff.

4. Buying stuff is part of our quest for fulfillment.

In my early twenties, I thought buying lots of possessions would lead to fulfillment and happiness. I assumed that stuff would be a pathway to joy and greater sense of self and consumer culture reinforced this idea. However, research suggests that materialism doesn’t lead to a happy and fulfilled life. Buying more stuff brings a temporary boost of happiness, but that boost doesn’t last over the long run.

5. We want more because of our fear of missing out (FOMO)

According to experts at the Cleveland Clinic, “FOMO, or the fear of missing out, refers to the feeling or perception that other people are having fun, experiencing new things or living a better life than you.”FOMO can be fueled by what we see on television, social media, and what our family and friends are doing. In my experience, FOMO created a false sense of urgency to acquire new possessions – like name brand clothing. I wasn’t buying things out of need. Instead, I bought things because I was scared of being left behind.

6. We may seek comfort through shopping.

In my early twenties I tried to see comfort through “retail therapy;” specifically by purchasing new outfits for work. Wikipedia explains, “Retail therapy or shopping therapy is shopping with the primary purpose of improving the buyer’s mood or disposition. It occurs either due to people taking pleasure in shopping or during periods of depression or stress. Items purchased during periods of retail therapy are sometimes referred to as ‘comfort buys.’”Engaging in this activity seemed to reduce my anxiety. However, shopping for stuff only provided momentary relief. It didn’t work over the long run.

7. Hedonic adaptation can make us think we need more.

In an interview with Greater Good Magazine, Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky talked about the myths associated with happiness and hedonic adaptation.

“Hedonic adaptation means that human beings are remarkable at getting used to changes in their lives. It is evolutionarily adaptive, and perhaps hardwired, so all of us get used to the familiar … But the downside of hedonic adaptation is that when a relationship becomes familiar—or when a job becomes familiar, or when your new car becomes very familiar to you—then you start taking the spouse or job or car for granted. You stop paying attention to them, and that’s when we have adapted,” says Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky. Over time, you will adjust to a new job, relationship, and your possessions. Remember, adapting doesn’t necessarily mean you need to acquire more.

10 Tips to Curb the Desire for More

In the section above, I summarized some of the facets associated with the psychology of stuff. Now I’m going to address ways to curb the desire for more. In an article in Scientific American, Why We Are So Attached To Our Stuff, we learn, “Consciously or not, many of us feel that our possessions are part of our extended self. A deeper, even less conscious belief is that through physical contact, our things actually become imbued with our essence.” I’m not a psychologist but I have changed everything about how I relate to stuff. My emotional attachment to material goods has changed significantly and the following practices have helped.

1. Practice Gratitude

My husband and I are doing the program outlined in Your Money or Your Life, again. Part of the program includes inventorying one’s belongings. It’s going to take us a while to inventory all of our stuff. However, the process has left us feeling grateful for all the things in our life and allowed us to see how the psychology of stuff and wanting more of it has impacted us. Cultivating a practice of appreciating what you already have can help you avoid shopping for more stuff, and you’ll likely get a happiness boost along the way!

2. “Gear not stuff”

In Scarcity Brain, Michael Easter wrote about a rule – “gear not stuff” – that guides his purchases.Easter said, “… Stuff is a possession for the sake of it. Stuff adds to a collection of items we already have. We often use stuff to fill an emotional impulse or to advertise to society that we’re a certain type of person. Or it solves a perceived problem we could have solved better with a bit of creativity. Gear, on the other hand, has a clear purpose of helping us achieve a higher purpose.”This approach echoes how I view my stuff. Gear helps me keep clutter at bay and avoid unnecessary purchases.

3. Create a Budget

Decluttering my finances helped me stop shopping for material possessions I don’t really care about, and it reduced my stress. Also, budgeting became an unexpected source of joy. These days, I love tracking my spending and income on a spreadsheet and visually. For example, author Vicki Robin recommends creating a graph of your spending and income. Tables can be difficult to conceptualize, but figures make larger trends easier to understand.

4. Embrace Experiences over Possessions

I don’t shop for stuff very often. However, I love to buy experiences. Taking trips to visit friends, going on local adventures, or eating at a restaurant with friends make me happier than buying a new outfit or a new tech gadget. It appears that many others feel similarly.“A new international survey of consumers finds that an overwhelming majority — 76 percent — would rather spend their money on experiences instead of products,” says reporter Mark Huffman. Cheers to prioritizing experiences over buying more stuff!

5. Unplug from Consumer Culture

It’s impossible to fully unplug from consumer culture however, I have set boundaries. For example, I’m not on social media, I don’t carry debt, I stopped following fashion trends, and I recognize my triggers.“Are there certain stores that prompt you to make unnecessary purchases? Are there products, addictions, or pricing patterns (such as clearance sales) that evoke an automatic response from you? Do specific emotions (sadness, loneliness, grief, or boredom, perhaps) give rise to mindless consumption? Identify, recognize, and understand these weaknesses,” writes Joshua Becker.

These questions remind me to focus on activities like spending time outside, hanging out with friends, or engaging in hobbies; not shopping.

6. Practice Mindful Consumption

Before I buy something new, I add it to my “to-buy list.” Then I wait for 30 days before I make the purchase. This gives me time to assess my needs and to watch for signals about why I want to buy something new instead of making an impulse purchase. My list and understanding the psychology of stuff has helped me practice mindful consumption and save money!

7. Join the Sharing Economy

Writer Akhilesh Ganti defines the sharing economy as “an economic model that allows consumers to share in the creation or use of products, goods, and services. This sharing often takes place across digital platforms, such as online communities or apps.” For example, last year my husband and I sold our car. Our car sat in our parking space 90% of the time; that seemed like a waste. Instead of driving, we ride our bicycles or take the bus. For longer trips, we rent or use a car-sharing service. As a bonus, we are saving money and feel better because we spend more time outside.

Other examples of the sharing economy include reselling via apps, equipment rentals, tool libraries, clothing rental services, and more.

8. Educate Yourself on Sustainable Practices

Last year, I wrote an article about simple and sustainable living. Here’s a blurb from the article:“When I started to simplify my life, my focus was on getting out of the work-spend cycle, decluttering, and learning how to manage my money. Over time, I shifted my attention outward and began to explore the connection between sustainable and simple living. Reading and watching short films – like The Story of Stuff – shifted my perspective and helped me become a little more ‘eco-friendly.’

One of the best things I’ve done as I’ve simplified and learn more about the psychology of stuff is to consume less. For example, I stopped replacing perfectly good things with new things. I’ve also experimented with composting, picking up trash for fun, learning new skills, and more.” If you want to educate yourself on sustainable practices, the article and resource list is a great starting point.

9. Make Decluttering a Regular Practice

Decluttering is a regular part of my life, and I love my clutter-free home. Our stress and anxiety has decreased because we spend less time cleaning. Plus, our clutter-free living space feels cozy and calm. If you aren’t sure where to begin, try these tiny tasks. As a cautionary note, try not to fall into the trap of buying more stuff to organize your stuff. When I first started decluttering I thought I needed shelving, tote boxes, and baskets. Decluttering should involve reducing items, not just organizing them.

10. Find Support

Create a support system to help you curb the desire to buy more stuff. You can do this with friends, family, or in an online community. For example, my support system keeps me motivated, accountable, and inspired to keep my life simple!The psychology of stuff is complex. However, learning about the topic and implementing strategies to curb the desire for more can help you become a mindful consumer and create a simple and joyful life.

Resources

If you want to learn more about the psychology of stuff, and why we want more, check out the following books from your library. If you prefer to listen, try an audiobook or podcasts about similar topics.

  • The Story of Stuff by Annie Leonard

There may be affiliate links in this post of which I receive a small commission.

The Psychology Of Stuff: Why We Want More (2024)
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