Relationships are crucial for human well-being as they fulfill our fundamental need for connection, providing essential emotional support and fostering personal growth. Ultimately, interactions with others serve as profound learning grounds where we discover more about ourselves.
Neurobiologically, positive relationships trigger the activation of reward centers in the brain, creating a sense of fulfillment and happiness. On the other hand, experiences of social rejection can induce stress responses, underscoring the profound impact relationships have on our mental and emotional states. The intricate interplay between our social connections and neurobiology highlights the importance of cultivating positive relationships.
We all have relationships that impact us deeply, some positively — others more negatively. When a relationship ends but continues to drain you, drag you down, or make it impossible to move forward, a practice known as energetic cord cutting can be a powerful tool for healing and letting go.
A cord cutting ritual draws from psychological insights and spiritual wisdom, aims to address the lingering emotional attachments that hinder personal growth, and fosters a renewed sense of emotional well-being and liberation.
This article explores the concept of cord cutting, its benefits, and how to perform a cord cutting ritual.
Key takeaways:
- Cord cutting is a practice to sever unhelpful emotional ties.
- It’s a tool for healing and moving forward from past relationships.
- The ritual involves grounding, visualization, symbolic severing, and energy cleansing.
- Success signs include relief, peace, and increased energy.
- The focus is on changing your own energy, not the other person’s.
Ready to begin? Dive in quickly with this 4.8-star cord cutting meditation from Insight Timer teacher, Jessie Weeks.
What is energetic cord cutting?
The basis of a cord cutting are the energetic bonds.
In some traditions, it’s accepted that when we form bonds with other people, we create invisible, energetic cords that link us to them. These threads that connect us to other people can spring from any relationship — friendship, family, or romantic love.
In more negative relationships, these cords can become burdens that hinder our:
- Self-improvement
- Growth
- Inner peace
A cord cutting ceremony can be part of your healing process and ability to release negative emotional ties.
Energetic cord cutting is a method to release emotional ties that no longer serve your growth. You can use a cord cutting ritual to protect your energy, heal from past relationships, let go of lingering resentment, and pave the way for new, healthier connections.
Typically, a cord cutting ritual consists of a visualization meditation and a symbolic or literal cord (like a string, rope, thread etc.) It’s a symbolic practice aimed at releasing negative bonds or attachments to a person, situation, or past event. While it can vary depending on personal beliefs and practices, a typical cord-cutting ritual involves intention-setting, cord cutting, forgiveness, and release.
It shouldn’t be a surprise that cord cutting ceremonies are practiced. Rituals and ceremonies have been an integral part of human culture and society throughout history. They provide us with tangible ways to process and deal with our emotions, helping us transition from one phase to another.
Anthropologist Dimitris Xygalatas shares,
“Rituals play very important functions in human societies. They help individuals through their anxieties, connect to one another.”
Cord cutting taps into the universal human tradition of using rituals to facilitate emotional healing and personal growth.
When to perform a cord cutting ceremony
Knowing just the right moment for the ritual can boost the impact of a cord cutting ceremony. Here are a few occasions when you might think about doing a cord cutting ritual:
- After the end of a relationship: This could be a romantic relationship, friendship, or even a professional relationship. If the relationship has ended and you find yourself unable to move forward, a cord cutting ceremony could help you let go.
- When feeling particularly drained by an individual: If someone in your life constantly leaves you feeling emotionally drained, it might be time to consider a cord cutting ceremony. This can help you regain your energy and emotional balance.
- When you’re ready to move on from past experiences: If you find yourself constantly thinking about a past event or experience that causes you emotional distress, a cord cutting ceremony can help you break free from those thoughts and move on. If you feel like your past is holding you back from embracing new experiences and opportunities, a cord cutting ceremony can help you create space in your life.
- When you’re unable to let go of resentment or bitterness: If you’re holding onto feelings of bitterness or resentment towards someone, those negative emotions can hinder your personal growth. A cord cutting ceremony can aid in releasing them.
Read more: Explore how to protect your energy and deal with difficult people and situations.
Signs of unhealthy cording
- Energy levels are depleted
- Feelings of general leathery, depression, unexplained sadness
- Feelings of being ‘stuck’ or unable to make decision (Explore how mindfulness helps to make difficult decisions here.)
- Obsessive thoughts about another person
- Speaking often about another person, often in a judgmental or deprecating way
- Lowered immune function, getting sick often
- Unhealthy habits and addictive behaviours, seeking comfort in excess such as smoking, binge eating, drinking, drugs and even seemingly healthy habits such as over-exercising
Read more: Join Dr. Candice Creasmanas she explains what boundary violations are and why boundaries are a source of discomfort and spiritual confusion.
How to do a cord cutting ritual
Cord cutting ceremonies will look different for everyone because the experience can be deeply personal, but there are a few common steps you can take. These steps include:
- Grounding yourself through meditation or breathwork — Before initiating the ritual, it is essential to establish a grounded foundation. This often involves engaging in meditation or breathwork exercises to center your energy, fostering a state of calm and focus.
- Visualizing the energetic cord connecting you to the individual or situation — The core of the ritual involves visualizing the energetic cord connecting you to the individual or situation. This mental imagery allows for a heightened awareness of the emotional ties that are being addressed and ultimately severed.
- Symbolically or literally using a tool to sever the cord — The act of severing the cord is a pivotal step in the ceremony. This can be done symbolically, such as through a visualization of cutting the cord with scissors, or even employing a physical object as a representation of the severance, signifying a deliberate break from the emotional ties.
- Cleansing your energy field and filling the space left by the cord with love and compassion — After the cord is cut, cleansing your energy field becomes imperative. This step involves removing any residual energies associated with the past emotional attachment. Techniques may include visualization, smudging with sage, or other rituals aimed at purifying the energy surrounding you. Following the severance and cleansing, it is essential to fill the void left by the cord with positive energies. This involves consciously infusing the space with feelings of love and compassion, fostering an environment conducive to personal healing and growth.
The effectiveness of a cord cutting ritual relies on patience and often requires multiple attempts. Success in severing emotional ties and fostering personal healing may take time, necessitating repeated efforts. Patience is crucial as individuals navigate the complexities of their emotional landscapes, unveiling layers of attachment. The iterative nature underscores the depth of the healing journey, emphasizing that transformative effects unfold gradually through dedication.
Interested in doing a cord cutting meditation? Here are a few you can try now:
- Cord cutting Meditation: General
- Cord-Cutting Meditation: Release
- Unhealthy Attachments
- Cord Cutting
- Cord Cutting Meditation
Does cord cutting actually work?
Cord cutting is a deeply personal journey that depends on one’s beliefs and spiritual philosophies. But as mentioned above, ceremonies and rituals have played a large role in personal healing throughout time.
Experiences vary, but the common thread is a positive shift and a release of negative energy. Many people report feeling lighter and like a heavy burden has been lifted off their shoulders. Others experience a sense of peace and calmness.
The placebo effect holds intriguing power, especially in the context of cord cutting. This phenomenon occurs when someone feels better due to their belief in a treatment, even if it lacks scientific evidence. It may be helpful in this context to think of placebo effect as real evidence of the power of mind over the state of the body.
In the realm of cord cutting, individuals experience energy healing and inner peace. These outcomes are influenced by the strong belief in the effectiveness of the ritual, showcasing the remarkable impact our thoughts can have on our emotional well-being.
Benefits of cord cutting
Typically cord cutting ceremonies help individuals achieve closure from past relationships, particularly those that have left lasting emotional wounds. However, it can also lead to temporary feelings of emptiness or disorientation as one adjusts to the absence of familiar energies.
The key benefits of a cord cutting ritual are:
- Achieving closure from past relationships: The act of cord cutting can provide a sense of finality and closure to past relationships that may still be causing emotional distress.
- Healing emotional wounds: By severing the energetic cords tied to painful memories or experiences, the ritual can facilitate healing and recovery from those emotional wounds.
- Freeing up energy for personal development: Energetic cords can drain energy. By cutting them, you free up this energy to be used for your personal growth and development.
- Promoting emotional growth: The practice of cord cutting provides a symbolic act of releasing past resentment, regret, or bitterness — enabling you to let go of any emotional baggage and better respond to future emotional experiences.
- Facilitating a shift towards positivity: By severing ties with past negative experiences, you can welcome an energetic shift, paving the way for positivity and growth in your life.
Free yourself. Try this helpful 10-day self-relationship course with clinical psychologist, Tara Brach, Ph.D. She shares some powerful approaches that can help heal blame and resentment while fostering forgiveness —with yourself and others.
Are there mental health benefits to cord cutting practices?
Cord cutting is not intended to replace professional mental health treatment. However, it can serve as a complement to such services.
By engaging in cord cutting, you may find it easier to let go of past traumas and toxic relationships hindering your present life. Moreover, research shows that ritual can also be instrumental in reducing anxiety levels, as it promotes the release of stress and tension built up over time. The result is often a heightened sense of peace and well-being, leading to a more positive outlook toward life’s challenges.
Signs your cord cutting practice is helping
Hallmark signs that your cord cutting practice is working, include
- Having a profound sense of freedom
- Feeling unburdened and liberated
- A sense that considerable weight has been lifted off your shoulders
You might also experience a surge in energy. This increased vitality indicates you’re successfully severing the negative ties depleting your energy reserves.
Another common indication that your cord cutting technique is working is a reduced emotional reaction to thoughts about a specific person or situation. You might find you can maintain a more balanced and detached perspective rather than feeling overwhelmed by emotions when thinking about them.
How does cord cutting affect the other person?
The focus of cord cutting is on self-improvement and finding inner peace. It is an internal process — changing your own individual energy without attempting to alter others’ perceptions of you.
Cord cutting is about changing your energy—not the other person’s.
While the primary objective of cord cutting is focused on one’s internal energy and well-being, it’s important to recognize that this practice can inadvertently impact the other person’s energy. This acknowledgment underscores the interconnected nature of relationships.
The effects of cord cutting may extend beyond the emotional realm and manifest in both physical and mental aspects.
- Physically, cord cutting may lead to a reduced sense of stress and tension in interactions with the individual for both you and the other person.
- Mentally, it can contribute to a more balanced and detached perspective, promoting a healthier dynamic for the both of you.
It’s essential to approach cord cutting with mindfulness of its potential effects, fostering a space for positive transformations for both of you.
My cord cutting didn’t work. What can I do to move on?
If you feel like your cord cutting ritual didn’t work, it’s important to be patient with yourself.
Healing takes time, and sometimes multiple attempts are necessary.
This can depend on the length and depth of the relationship you have with that person. You can perform the ritual for as long or as often as you want.
In the meantime, here are some other tools you can try to help you move on:
- Practice mindfulness exercises, like meditation or yoga, to enhance emotional awareness.
- Find your ideal joyful movement, which can help release pent-up emotions.
- Consider journaling to express your feelings and track your progress over time.
- Seek professional guidance from a spiritual advisor or therapist.
The practice of energetic cord cutting can be a powerful part of your journey toward empowerment, inner peace, self-care, and self-love.
You can use a cord cutting ritual to not only heal past wounds but also propel yourself toward a future of positive growth and emotional well-being.
Cord cutting FAQ
What does cord cutting mean spiritually?
Cord cutting is a spiritual practice that involves severing emotional ties that no longer serve our well-being and personal growth. It is a method of releasing old energy that may be holding us back, allowing us to heal from past relationships and move forward.
What is cord cutting in psychology?
In psychology, cord cutting might be seen as a form of emotional detachment or boundary setting, where an individual consciously decides to sever emotional ties or reduce the impact of a previous relationship on their current emotional state.
What is cord cutting in astrology?
In the context of astrology, cord cutting could be related to planetary movements or aspects that signify endings or letting go. The specific astrological implications would depend on individual charts and astrologer interpretations.
What is a cord cutting ritual?
A cord cutting ritual involves a series of steps aimed at severing emotional or energetic ties with another person or situation. Common steps include grounding oneself, visualizing the energetic cord, mentally or physically cutting the cord, and cleansing one’s energy field afterward.
What are some ways to release energy cords?
While we are a culture that likes to try to ‘think’ our way through things, in order to regain the energy that we have lost through cord connections, we must engage energetically. There are many ways to cut cords and establish energetic boundaries — a few I will present to you now:
- Salt Bath: Salt helps to cleanse your energetic body and brings you into a state of balance.
- Smudging: The ritual of cleansing with smoke is one that purifies the energetic body and helps to re-establish connection with the Divine.
- Journaling: Write out everything that you have been wanting to say to another person. Don’t hold back. Share your frustrations and your desires. After you are complete you may choose to burn the writing as a symbol of release. Read more about the transformation benefits of writing out your thoughts and emotions.
- Visualization: In your mind’s eye, visualize the individual you wish to cut a cord with and scissors so that you can cut the cord. Begin by connecting to the energy of the Divine — the source of all creation. See the energetic cord that connects you with the other. Feel the energy that is draining from you. Now, with intention, visualize yourself cutting the cord between you with the scissors and witness as the energetic cord recoils back into both you and the other. Take a moment to anchor the experience by feeling the recovery of energy and thanking the other person for the role that they have/do play in your life.
What should I say during an energetic cord-cutting?
You may choose to speak the following blessing after these practices of cutting energetic cords:
- I now sever and release any and all energetic cords that do not serve my highest good. I release you and I release me from these binds.
- All cords are destroyed, across all dimensions, times and planes, never to return again.
- I hereby banish these energetic cords and recover now all energy that was once lost. My energy flows back to me, filling me once again with vitality and creating now a peaceful energetic boundary of love and light.
And so it is.
After you have spoken the blessing, spend some time sitting in quiet meditation. Feel the energy that has been reclaimed and take the time needed to re-integrate.
Imagine yourself now being cloaked in a luminescent blanket of energetic protection. This coating of light is your energetic boundary. See and feel how this boundary helps you to maintain your highest level of energy. Intend that this boundary remain in place as you step confidently forward into your day.
Can you cut cords with a soulmate?
Yes. While it can feel extremely challenging to cut the cord from someone you believe to be your soulmate, you can do it if the relationship is causing distress or hindering personal growth. However, cord cutting doesn’t necessarily mean ending the relationship. It’s about releasing negative emotions and patterns that aren’t serving you.
Can you cut cords from a twin flame?
Similar to a soulmate, you can perform a cord cutting ritual with a twin flame. However, it’s important to note that cutting cords doesn’t mean you are detaching from the relationship entirely, but rather you are releasing any negativity or emotional baggage associated with that relationship.
References
Edwards, S. (2015). Love and the Brain. Harvard Medical School. https://hms.harvard.edu/news-events/publications-archive/brain/love-brain
Lang, M., Krátký, J., & Xygalatas, D. (2020). The role of ritual behaviour in anxiety reduction: an investigation of Marathi religious practices in Mauritius. Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society B: Biological Sciences, 375(1805), 20190431. https://doi.org/10.1098/rstb.2019.0431
Solan, M. (2022, December 1). The real power of placebos. Harvard Health. https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/the-real-power-of-placebos
