5 min read · Mar 15, 2024
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The concept of optimism is founded on a partial truth, and basing your life on partial truths is like hanging onto a thin thread at the edge of a deadly cliff. I’ll share my story with you to explain why I decided to stop practicing “optimism only” and what I do instead. Feel free to criticize my judgments in the comments.
For many, optimism means "focusing your thoughts on the positive to actualize the belief that whatever you think of will surely come to pass."
Others see optimism as "a general expectation that good things will happen, believing the future will be favorable because we can control important outcomes,"_mostly through our thoughts.
However, we often overlook the words of the wisest Man who ever lived: "For everything, there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven..."
Pay attention to the phrase "a time for every matter"—not some, not a few, but every matter.
Some time ago, a year after I dropped out of school, I won a business grant—a moment filled with hope and happiness in my life.
The grant required setting up a physical location for the business. Initially hesitant, I agreed to the terms in order to access the funds.
Soon I embraced the idea of becoming a shop owner—a ready-to-wear retailer—with a beautifully decorated workspace. Here, I could showcase the excellent tailoring skills I've acquired for over 8 years now.
It was a realistic dream, and I was extremely optimistic that things would unfold as I desired. I carefully designed the layout of my shop and the arrangement of my equipment in my mind. I even brought it to life with a sketch on paper. My focus was solely on the positive possibilities—after all, that's what optimism is all about.
Soon I secured a space for my shop, envisioning every detail—from the paint color on the walls to the curtain for the dressing room, the layout of the cutting table, and the arrangement of clothes racks and mannequins. Negative thoughts and potential setbacks never crossed my mind; I was intentionally focused on the belief that everything would unfold exactly as planned.
Days before setting up my shop, disaster struck! My smartphone, my sole digital workspace, suddenly crashed and refused to boot.
No warning, no signs—just a panic-inducing moment as I desperately tried to reboot it. Stuck on the booting logo, my optimism led me to believe it was a minor issue, fixable with a quick and inexpensive phone repair.
The next day, I took it to a tech expert who tried everything until the phone's battery died, leaving us uncertain if it was charging or not.
This expert referred me to another technician with better software capabilities, now my optimistic nature was going down. I went to the second technician, after two days of attempts he admitted that the phone was beyond repair.
A friend then recommended a third person, and though my hope was diminished, I maintained a positive attitude. Unfortunately, the outcome was the same—irreparable.
I was unable to sell it due to the phone specification and scarcity in Nigeria, my only digital tool for selling, branding, marketing, and positioning my business was gone. It was in this moment that reality struck.
I faced a dilemma—accept the situation, acquire a new smartphone, and abandon my original shop setup plans.
My carefully planned budget for the shop, now needed adjustment due to this unexpected turn of events. It was a strict budget, and the sudden predicament forced a change in my well-thought-out plan. I felt devastated!
This unexpected turn of events made me realize that I had been living too much in the future I created in my head. I held the confidence that everything would work out great if I believed and remained optimistic.
1. Optimism is rooted in hope and positive expectations, but these alone is not a solid strategy in tough times. It requires a strong foundation for certainty.
2. Optimism can blind your mind to change:
Insisting on optimism at the wrong time can lead to denialism of your true situation, toxic positivity, or avoidance. Remember, there’s a "...time for every matter under heaven."
Now, consider this scenario: In a world that often promotes adopting an optimistic attitude, where positive expectations reign, it is believed that
The profound pain from unexpected predicaments can pose a threat to your mental health.
As Michel de Montaigne once said, "Since all the precautions that a man can take are full of uneasiness and uncertainties, it is better to prepare with fine assurance for the worst that can happen and derive some consolation from the fact that we're not sure it will happen."
While I may agree with the idea of preparing for the worst (mentally), finding consolation in uncertainty is not sufficient for me.
How does finding consolation in uncertainty help us survive when things eventually go bad?
Is being mentally prepared for the worse enough to survive tough times?
It’s simple; Instead of practicing optimism only, I learned to manage my expectations by faith in God’s word. Only then can I find consolation in the truth that:
"all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to his will and purpose."
What a strong pillar to rely on!
There should be a stronger foundation to base your optimism upon.
Now, instead of just being optimistic, I choose not to bother about the negative or positive outcome of things but to be rest assured that God establishes whatever plan we commit into his hands.
That's how I've found my peace and consolation, in a positive attitude that requires unwavering faith in God's intentionality and a consistent reminder to trust in the one who is at the "beginning," at the "now," and the "end" of my life.
I would love to hear your thoughts on optimism. How do you handle unexpected events that turned out negative?
See you next Tuesday on:
4 Undeniable Reasons Why Most Believers Do Not Grow Spiritually.
| About Me
I’m @_victoryfrancis on Twitter and Instagram
