What to Do When Your Boyfriend Says He Needs Space: 10 Tips (2024)

FAQs

What to do when boyfriend says he needs space? ›

You shouldn't try to force yourself into helping him out, but put out the offer so he can reach out when he needs to. “I know you need some space, but I'm just a call away if you need to chat.” “I'm here for you when you're ready to talk.” “I'm always here to support you, so don't be afraid to ask.”

What You Can Say if Your Partner Wants Space. "Thank you for being honest with me and sharing your feelings. I understand that you need some space right now." "I want you to know that I respect your need for space, and I'm here to support you however you need."

When your partner announces that they need space, it can set off alarm bells. But it doesn't mean something is wrong or that they want to break up with you. Being a couple involves balancing together time and alone time. Taking time apart is healthy and can help your relationship thrive.

In short: yes — as long as both people in the relationship want it to. “Space can heal a relationship,” explains Jason Polk, a licensed clinical social worker and couples therapist in Denver, Colorado, “especially if the couple is currently toxic or verbally abusive to each other.”

Say, “You're really important to me, and I can see that you need some space right now. I'm going to give you the space you need, and I hope this will strengthen our relationship in the long-term.”

It may also be helpful to understand that someone's need for space does not mean that they dislike you or the relationship they have with you. It's important to set boundaries to have a healthy relationship. Some people need more space than others, and everyone has a unique personality and set of needs.

If your partner says they need space, it's easy to panic and think you've done something wrong—but the truth is, a little bit of space is healthy in a relationship. Sometimes we start spending too much time together or we miss our friends or we just aren't feeling like ourselves—and space can help reset the balance.

According to relationship experts, one option is to divide your time with and without your partner 70/30. This means that, ideally, you should spend 70% of your time together and 30% of your time apart.

For some, a few days are enough to gain clarity, while others might need a few weeks or even months. Setting a tentative time frame at the beginning is key to avoid any uncertainty. Perhaps start with a week and evaluate how you feel from there.

I recommend three weeks because anything less than that is too short and anything over that starts to get a bit too long. If you can wait until he reaches out to you, until he makes an effort, that would be the best. Listen, I know it's hard.

What is the 3 day rule after an argument? ›

The 3 day rule after argument is a common practice in relationships where individuals agree to take a 3 day relationship break from each other after a heated disagreement. During this time, both parties cool off, reflect on their feelings/thoughts, and avoid communication with each other.

No, not necessarily. In fact, if you respect your partner's desire for space, it could potentially make the relationship stronger. If you have concerns, have a heart-to-heart talk with your partner about why they want space and what it means for your relationship.