Albert Einstein is known for the short quote,“Question Everything”.He was encouraging curiosity and an expansive mind. The truth is we are born with a natural desire to question everything and be curious, but along the path of growing up many of us lose that desire.The reality is that society deters us from asking questions from an early age.Most of us can recall a parent or teacher saying, ‘Stop asking so many questions’.And so we stop.Somewhere along the way we correlate asking questions with sounding ignorant, lacking understanding, asking the wrong question, being troublesome and lacking significant value.Some people even go so far as becoming egocentric in regards to questioning – they think they know everything and don’t care enough to ask even a few basic questions.
Asking questions is truly the opposite of being ignorant or other negative perceptions.Asking questions is about curiosity, commitment and gaining deeper understanding.Questions are key to building rapport and relationships, and are an important component of building trust and respect.Asking questions create great benefit for both the person asking the question and the person being encouraged to answer the question.Think about it – most of us like the reflection that comes from sharing information and ideas, but we often miss that opportunity because no one asks.
Skillful questioning is about asking the right type of question at the right time.Most of us are familiar with open and closed questions.Closed and direct questions are used when we need some quick validation and are usually one or a few words.Examples of close-ended questions: ‘Where is the meeting?’ ‘Did you complete the project on time?’‘How often do we schedule the maintenance?’We want data versus information.Open-ended questions are used when we want more information:‘What is the purpose of the meeting?’ ‘What were the key issues with meeting the project deadline?’‘Tell me more about the scheduling process?’
My favorite type of question, and the one I consider the most valuable, is an insight question.Insight questions go beyond information gathering.Insight questions focus on depth of information: these questions challenge new ways of thinking and help the responder mov#e beyond the obvious.Insight questions encourage innovation, mitigation of risk and avoidance of oversight. Think about insight questions this way – when you ask such questions you are asking the responder to expand and broaden their thinking.A few examples of insight questions include:‘If you were to create an alternative approach, what would it look like?’‘What are the risks of not doing …?’ ‘If compromise is an alternative, how do we go about making it happen?’ And one of my all time favorites, ‘What am I not asking you that I should?’
Asking good questions is a skill, but it is a practiced skill.That means we can become accomplished questioners with practice.Practice includes not only knowing the right type of questions for the given time or situation, but also understanding the proper sequence of questions, the right tone of voice and the aptitude of the audience.
But it all starts with remembering you were born with a desire to understand and be curious.Find that inner part of yourself and simply start asking questions – any type of question.You will be surprised how easy asking questions can be.And more important, you will be pleased with what you learn, the level of influence you develop, how others open up and the level of respect you receive.
Visit www.mjginsights.com for more articles and information
