Learn what to do if you don't see your Ask to Buy notifications, or if your child sees "Unable to Ask Permission" after asking your family group organizer to make a purchase.
Things to try first
Make sure that both you and your child have updated to the latest iOS or iPadOS on your iPhone or iPad, and the latest macOS on your Mac.
If you turned on Focus on your device, either turn it off so that you can receive notifications, or check your Focus settings to make sure that you can receive Time Sensitive notifications like Ask to Buy requests.
Try changing the name of your device, and check that you and your child's devices have different names. To see and change the name of a device, go to Settings > General > About > Name.
Confirm that your child's contact card is correctly filled out on their device, including their full name and Apple ID email address or phone number, so Ask to Buy notifications are sent and received through Messages.
If your Ask to Buy requests are missing
If you miss an Ask to Buy notification, you can find the request in Messages on your iPhone, iPad, Apple Watch, or Mac.
In iOS 15 and iPadOS 15 and earlier, and in macOS Monterey and earlier, you can find the request in Notification Center on your iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, or Mac.
Open Notification Center on your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch
From the Lock Screen, swipe up from the middle of the screen.
From any other screen, swipe down from the center of the top of your screen.
Open Notification Center on your Mac
Click the date in the upper right corner of your screen or swipe left with two fingers from the right edge of your trackpad. Notifications show up at the top of Notification Center.
If you still don't see your Ask to Buy requests, check your Family Sharing settings, check which Apple ID you're signed in with, and make sure that you're on a supported device.
If your child sees an "Unable to Ask Permission" message
After Ask to Buy is turned on, and your child asks the organizer of your family group to approve a purchase, your child might see "Unable to Ask Permission. You can’t ask permission, because you have signed in with iCloud and iTunes accounts that are not associated with each other."
When you see this message, check your Family Sharing settings, check which Apple ID you're signed in with, and make sure that you're on a supported device.
Review your Family Sharing settings
If you're the family organizer, you can go to your Settings or System Preferences to see if your family members' accounts have Ask to Buy turned on.
On your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch
Go to Settings.
Tap Family. If you don't see Family, tap your name, then tap Family Sharing.
If you're the family organizer, make sure that Purchase Sharing is turned on. Then you can tap a family member's name to see if Ask to Buy is turned on for their account.
On your Mac
In macOS Ventura or later:
Choose Apple menu > System Settings.
Click Family.
If you're the family organizer, click Purchase Sharing and make sure that Share My Purchases is turned on.
Click a family member's name, then click Ask to Buy to see if it's turned on for that person.
In macOS Monterey or earlier:
Choose Apple menu > System Preferences.
Click Family Sharing.
If you're the family organizer, click Purchase Sharing and make sure that Share My Purchases is turned on.
Click Family Sharing and click Details next to a family member's name to see if Ask to Buy is turned on for that person.
Check the Apple ID that you're using for purchases
Make sure that you're signed in to the App Store, iTunes Store, Apple TV app, Apple Music app, or Apple Books using the same Apple ID that you selected for sharing content with your family.
Learn how to use your own Apple ID for Family Sharing
On your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch
In iOS 16 or iPadOS 16 or later:
Go to Settings > Family.
Tap your name.
Make a note of which Apple ID is listed.
Tap Purchases.
Tap Apple ID for Purchases and make sure that you're signed in with with the same Apple ID that you use for Family Sharing. If not, tap Share using secondary Apple ID and enter the Apple ID and password for that Apple ID.
In iOS 15 or iPadOS 15 or earlier:
Go to Settings, tap your name, then tap Family Sharing.
Tap your name.
Make a note of the Apple ID that you're using.
Go back to Settings.
Tap your name, tap Media & Purchases, then tap View Account.
Make sure that you're using the same Apple ID.
On your Mac
In macOS Ventura or later:
Choose Apple Menu > System Settings, then click Family.
Click your name, then click Purchases.
Under Apple ID for Purchases, make a note of which Apple ID is listed.
Open the App Store.
Choose Store > Account.
Click Account Settings.
Make sure that you're using the same Apple ID.
In macOS Monterey or earlier:
Choose Apple menu > System Preferences.
Click Family Sharing, then click Details next to your name.
Make a note of the Apple ID that you're using for family purchases.
Open App Store. Click your name, then click View Information.
Make sure that you’re using the same Apple ID.
On your Apple TV
From the Home Screen, go to Settings > Users and Accounts > iCloud.
Choose your name. Make a note of the Apple ID.
Click the menu button on the Apple TV remote to return to the Users and Accounts screen.
Choose [your name]'s Account.
Make sure that you're using the same Apple ID.
Make sure that you're using a supported device
You need iOS 8 or later on your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch, and OS X Yosemite or later on your Mac to set up or join a Family Sharing group. When you try to make a purchase on an unsupported device, you'll still be asked to request permission. However, you won't get a notification when the family organizer approves or declines the request. If the family organizer makes the purchase and your content doesn't download automatically, you can tap the price again to download the item.
If Ask to Buy is turned on for your account
You can't buy iTunes Match, iTunes Gifts, or Donations.
If you download content from a family member's past purchases, you won't see an Ask to Buy prompt. Also, if you redeem a product code, you won't see Ask to Buy prompts.
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